Together Forward – Martha Heymann, End of Life Doula

“All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on”

-Havelock Ellis

What is a Grief Coach

Coaching is the only co-creative partnership model: Let me find out what you know first.

Psychotherapy and counseling ascribe to the more hierarchical model: I know what you need. Grief Coaches have an expertise in deep active listening, to what is being said and not said. We ask questions to clarify your individual thinking to evoke new insights, needs, wants, beliefs, and companion alongside you through the process of sorrow without leading the way.

Navigating grief is the transition to mourning as you realize what your life will now be. This process should not be hurried. Sorrow is the counter-weight of love and therefore should be given the grace it deserves. To rest in the wound is to know it’s depth. In this way you honor the person who has died, and given yourself permission to authentically feel.

What is an End of Life Doula?

A Doula serves one individual/family at a time, providing non-medical, non-judgmental, holistic support and comfort for clients living with a terminal diagnosis, by companioning them emotionally, physically and spiritually, however that is uniquely defined by that person.

Long before the care of hospice becomes part of one’s support team, a Doula can begin an important relationship with someone unexpectedly facing their mortality. Later, they fill in the gaps left by chaplains, social workers, palliative-care teams and hospice services with so many other responsibilities.

An End-of-Life Doula can return a sense of the sacred to a process that has become more medicalized and less compassionate. Through meaning-directed life review and insight into the dying process, there can be a difference in how everyone involved experiences the final journey of life.

“That it will never come again is what makes life so sweet.”

- Emily Dickinson

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Testimonials

"I strongly recommend Together Forward Doula. The support that was provided made me feel much more comfortable and confident through my journey working with Martha. Her teaching and follow up was consistent, caring, and compassionate."

"Experiencing your Death Over Dinner Game Night was like nothing I have ever been a part of. I never thought I would laugh during a conversation about dying, and also think so deeply. Thank you for creating such an intimate and easy space for this to unfold. Next time it's at my house. "

"My family and I are so grateful to have had Martha support and guide us along my mother's final journey. With her help we found ways to communicate with my mother in different ways until the end."

"I knew Martha was the right person to be with us through my sister's journey with cancer. We're doing so much important work together while she's still with us. We wouldn't know any of these things without her lovely guidance."

"Martha taught me I could get into bed with my dying sister when I felt so far away from her sitting next to the bed. I didn't know I could do that or how to do that. All these months later, I still think how powerful that experience was for both of us."

"I'm not one of Martha's clients with a terminal illness. I simply didn't want to wait to do some of the important work in preparation for my death. She and I have begun work on my Vigil Plan, a draft for my final days that can be modified until my loved ones need it. We will also script one or two Guided Imagery sessions to ease any mental or physical pain near the end of my life. This is a deeply liberating process I am glad not to be missing."